I'm Still Mourning Over Ghosts (Cervantes)

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It was mid spring, yet it seemed winter's icy, gnarled grasp was relentless to the area. There was still snow clinging to the forest floor and surrounding vegetation, and didn't appear that it would simply all melt before the sun reached it's peak high in the sky, which was a calm cloudless blue. At least it wasn't all that cold, perhaps a bit chilly to some, but not exactly freezing. You could possibly say the weather was nice, if you were a native to the land and knew of the weather during the colder months, but the little she-wolf was no longer familiar with such information, having been gone for nearly a year.

Her white pelt, once thick and shaggy, had thinned out considerably due to the change of habitat. She had went from living high up in the snowy mountains to living in the prairies, so everything about her had changed quite a bit. Her lighter pelt revealed her true frame more easily, which was actually very thin, not as thick and heavy as one might have once thought, and she was no longer as muscled. All the leanness that she earned from climbing and scaling mountains had quickly vanished, becoming useless due to the need to accommodate with the sudden change of living style. Well, that and the fact her diet went from decent to worse, as the area she had to hunt in became much simpler yet far more complicated. It had gone from the constant worry of slipping or getting caught in the snow to just hoping she'd be able to find something out in the barren landscape. She wasn't the same wolf she was before in many ways, appearance being one of them.

The reason for her sudden change of life was unknown to everyone but herself, and she planned on keeping it that way for as long as possible. If one were to ask, she would simply say that she was sick of the cold and needed a change, but alas, things weren't always so easy. The truth was that she was running from something, something horrible, just like the coward she was, running away when it all become too much instead of staying and gritting her teeth like a good little brave wolf.

It threatened to consume her, the guilt that came with running away, and it made her want to keep running, so she always did, from one corner of the world to the next and everywhere in between. She had went from the freezing mountains high up in the northeast to some dead peninsula in the south, but now, now she was slowly making her way back up the north, as she had found herself on the outskirts of the White Forest. She didn't know what could have possibly made her want to return to an area so close to the land where all her demons came from, but yet here she was, full of dread yet surprisingly excited. Perhaps it was her finally trying to make amends, or something else all heroic and brave, she didn't know and didn't want to care, just wanted to get it over with.


Her entire body quivered as she slowly picked her way deeper into the forest, her breath coming out in shallow, shaky breaths and her heart beating quickly, hammering loudly from somewhere deep in her chest. The thought of just turning around and running came often to her mind, but she stubbornly ignored it, instead focusing on the arduous task of just placing on paw in front of another. It seemed to be going so good, that was until her rounded black nose twitched, inhaling the scent of the forest, but also catching another whiff of something much more animal-like, being deep and musky. Her entire body froze, one paw awkwardly caught midstride. Was that a scent marking? The thought sent her head spinning, lungs expanding and closing quickly, breaths becoming even more panicked. She hadn't seen another wolf for a good year, and certainly wasn't ready to now, the farthest thing from ready. How the hell would she act? She barely knew the unspoken rules of society before, how would she suddenly know them after a year of self-inflicted isolation? She was too busy panicking to move or think about fleeing the area.

[Deleted]

Purple gaze ravaged the forest. It was still white. Cerva wondered if it would ever warm. Likely not, considering it's proximity to the Mountain, but you never knew. Cervantes surely didn't know. She had never seen the White Forest in the summer, but she didn't know if she ever would. Her pessimism was slowly taking over her mind. I won't live to see another year if I don't get some damned wolves to help me out around here. she thought. Paws thundered along the hard, frozen earth as she went around her territory. She checked the borders for scents, remarking every so often.

As she did this, she was reminded of a childhood incident. She had had a terrible childhood in general--one that had scarred her forever. But there was one thing that had happened--that still haunted her psych--that could be classified as an "accident". It had occurred on Everbane Mountain when she was a mere pup, with her only childhood friend. She resented the incident because it had stolen her friend from her. The she-wolf had disappeared shortly after it happened, although Cerva was still ignorant as to how she had survived. She had been unconscious for twenty-four hours, although she did not know the exact time. All she knew was that she paid for her absence--only adding to her acquired injuries. Somehow she had almost made a full recovery. She bore only two scars: a permanent niche in her left ear, and an ugly line that ran from her lip to the top of her muzzle on the left side. The line was covered in a soft, grey fur. It contrasted the rest of her snowy white muzzle, and therefore stood out. Cerva grimaced as she recalled the incident.

And then she froze. An unfamiliar scent assaulted her nose at the border. A low, rumbling growl erupted from her throat. What was it with the trespassing? Did every wolf decide to ignore her scent markers? Only one--a fellow alphess--had stayed at the border and called. Apparently, everyone else thought they should just waltz right in! Well, they damn well better be joining Conlan. Cervantes thought with annoyance.

She followed the scent deep into the Forest. The stupid wolf had gone into the very center of Conlan! They had only just missed the dens. They were more like igloos, but Cerva ignored that. She spotted the wolf ahead. At least it was female this time. Maybe she wouldn't be aggressive? Not that it mattered. If she was, Cerva would defend Conlan well. Cervantes hackles rose and her tail stood straight up. Her head was raised and her stature procured her full height. A low growl erupted from her throat as she approached: a warning that she was coming. She leveled her purple gaze upon the she-wolf's backside. They seemed to be frozen, mid-stride, in the light snow.

Welcome to Conlan, Stranger. Now, tell me why you have trespassed so far into my territory.

muse xx k-love
tags xx @marley
ooc xx lol she's pissed! Reply soon (: I'm so excited for this thread!!

[Deleted]

@ej

The second she heard the light crunch of footsteps in the snow, Marlene whipped around, her shaking only worsening as a sudden spike of adrenaline kicked in, making her blood sing as it pumped loudly through her veins. Her scrambled brain barely understood what the she-wolf was saying, just a growl followed by a blur of words, it was all going too fast. Her heart was about to burst, beating so loudly she was sure the other she-wolf could hear it.
Surprisingly, it all came naturally to her, the steps of submission. Her small frame caved in on itself, shoulders closing in and fur laying flat against her body as her head tucked itself against her chest, ears pinned back. She didn't get to really see the other she-wolf, just a blur of dark colours on a white background, but as her amber eyes stared determinedly at the other wolf's paws, she saw they were a motley of dark browns.

Bravely, her small head tilted the slightest way up, wanting to see the face of the she-wolf that stood before her. A mistake, as burning amber clashed with a dark purple, she flinched away, quickly turning her gaze back onto the wolf's dark paws. Dark purple, the colour of an old friend's eyes, a unique characteristic she had only saw on her. She hated the colour now, or rather, intensely feared it, afraid of what she might see in such a colour now.

All her bravado left her, and she didn't dare look up into the other wolf's eyes now, for fear of the unknown. Surely the heat of her new home had gotten to her, and she had collapsed, and this was all a cruel nightmare. Nightmares were common to her, and it wouldn't surprise her if she flinched awake soon, to see the endless abyss of stars above her head and find out that thank god, it was only all a dream. But this all seemed too real, because they weren't shouting that they hated her, that she should be dead, not them. Perhaps she really did leave her old home, and was really way up in the north.

Maybe she had gotten bitten by those creepy, messed up spiders with long pointed tails? She didn't know what the hell they did, maybe they caused hallucinations? Surely this was a ghost before her. Or she was just over thinking it all, desperation for some sort of closure making her force a face onto some random wolf.

Yes, that was it, surely.

Now calmer, she eased back into reality, but still stared at the ground. They had asked her something? What did they ask? She shook her head softly, eventually violently, swinging her fluffy white head back and forth quickly. She hadn't spoken in a good few months, and knew her voice would fail her. She didn't even know if she still knew how to talk. Hopefully this would suffice, because her memory was failing her now. She continued to fold into herself, tail tucked firmly between her legs and she slouched away from them.

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Purple gaze watched raptly as the she-wolf whipped around. Color drained from her face in a second and she froze once more. At Cerva's dominant and commanding voice, however, the wolfess shrunk into herself submissively. She tucked her chin to her chest, tightly squeezed her tail between her legs, pinned her silver ears against an ivory head, and crouched slightly. Her whole body language shouted submissiveness like it was an everyday posture for her. Cervantes waited for an answer, but none came. The she-wolf before her stared at Cerva's paws for a long time. Finally, she peered into the femme's face. But, as soon as her amber eyes met Cerva's stormy purple gaze, they fell away again, back to her large, brown paws.

Cerva's heart jumped when their eyes met, and she did not see the other's femme's eyes fill with confused, haunted guilt and then blank. Her mind was temporarily transported three and a half years. Two pups--opposite in coloring--tumbled together playfully on Everbane Mountain. They got into an insincere argument, and one tackled the other half-seriously. They play-fought to determine the winner. And then, one pushed the other off of her with her hindlegs and the other tumbled down the mountain. A terrified shriek echoed over the mountain, and then a low thud could be heard, accompanied by a minor crack.

Cervantes shivered and refocused her eyes on the she-wolf in front of her. Her eyes glanced over the wolf in confusion. Something was familiar about the strange body--thin and small as it was--and the coloring of it. And the eyes. Those eyes. Cerva shamelessly looked the other wolf over, purple eyes ravaging the other's body in an attempt to work it out. And then...

No, it couldn't be...

Silence reigned for a long time. And then, suddenly, Cerva's body relaxed almost entirely. She still stood tall, and alert; but her stature was no longer one of an annoyed, aggressive Alphess. Now, hers was one of disbelief and slightly annoyed posture. She still held some anger toward her friend. How could she just leave her? She knew what her family was like! Her parents! And yet, she had disappeared before Cerva had regained consciousness, leaving the pup to take the punishment and disdain by herself. She had grown up quite callous because of it all. However, Cervantes' voice was quiet, and filled with disbelief and question as she spoke.

Marley?

muse xx k-love
tags xx @marley
ooc xx I loved your reply c: here you go!

[Deleted]

@ej
The quickly growing silence was unbearable, full of tension that set her nerves alight. She had been waiting for a reprimand, a demand, or maybe even an attack, she didn't know, just anything but a childhood nickname. At the word, her insides froze, body tensing and ready to spring away at a moment's notice.

Her furry ears twitched up for only a second, wanting to make sure she had heard correctly, but other then that, she didn't give any other visible signs of a response. Surely this was all a mistake on her part, she was so desperate for closure that she hearing what she wanted to hear.

She opened her mouth to speak, but the words got caught in her throat, choking her. What was she going to say? What was she going to do? This wolf before her wasn't who she thought she was, and must have gotten mixed up or something. Perhaps asking for clarification would help. She could use her words like most normal people do, she may be a bit rusty, but a few words couldn't hurt her that much.

“....” Her first attempt was a low throaty whine. The words kept getting stuffed up in her head and made her skull feel as if it were about to split down the middle. Perhaps she would stick to one worded responses, until she was sure she wouldn't sound like a total idiot, whenever that may be.

“P-pardon?” The question was tiny wisp of a sound, garbled, broken and hoarse, barely even audible, but it was a word. If it was the right word, she didn't know. This was all a big mistake, when the other she-wolf heard her response, she would ask her name again, and it would be something else but very similar. It could be something like barley, and she could respond that no, her name wasn't barley, and this was all some big mistake, and then she could turn around and run, all the way back to her peninsula somewhere in the south. Yeah, that was what was going to happen, this was going to be some poor attempt at getting back into society and she could have a laugh or something about it at home, and would try another year. She would just have to try another time, she'd apologize to this she-wolf for intruding, and go home, where the sun was too hot, the night too cold, and everything was perfectly messed up and strange.

Her scattered thinking temporary placated herself while she waited for what seemed forever for the other wolf's response.

[Deleted]

The she-wolf still did not move. Her ears twitched, pointing forward to hear Cervantes' voice. Straining, it seemed. Her eyes never moved from Cerva's paws. She made no response. Maybe I was wrong... Cerva began to doubt that it was really her childhood friend. She was much too scrawny, and her coat was thin. She obviously lived in the warmer regions. Of course, Marley could have ran to the warmer regions. But surely she wouldn't be so scrawny. Cerva remembered her being built similar to herself as a pup. Not quite so big, but having a thick coat and a rounded body. Maybe it wasn't her...

The femme's mouth opened, but nothing came out. Cerva waited. Obviously, she was going to say something. Maybe Cerva's interpretation was wrong, and it only frightened the little wolfess further. She obviously had not seen Cerva's changing body language. Too focused on her brown paws. Cerva began to regain her indifferent, rude manner, when the she-wolf made a throaty whine. Cerva's ears pricked curiously. The wolf took a breath and opened her mouth once again.

P-pardon?

One word answers. Just like herself. Cervantes frowned. No, this was not Marley. She had never been so shy, so quiet. She had been very opinionated. Cervantes shook her head slightly, and her purple eyes lost their wistful hope. No, it could not be Marley.

My apologies. You simply reminded me of my childhood friend, Marley. Now, what is your business here?

muse xx k-love
tags xx @marley
ooc xx here you go!

[Deleted]

@ej
There was no further questioning or prodding, just a simple little comment that could very easily turn her entire world upside down. She reminded the other she-wolf of a childhood friend named Marley. Her nickname was Marley, but then again, there could very easily have been another white she- wolf named Marley, how would she know. But then again, she didn't grow up with much friends, practically none, and the only good one was dead because of her, so no, it had to be another Marley.

She ignored the comment, deciding to instead focus on something much simpler, like what was her business there. That was something she had yet to figure out for herself, but the process of choosing words, making sure they made sense and finally saying them out loud seemed to troublesome. Her bony shoulder raised and flopped back down, a quick little shrug, she didn't know why she was there, so why not just tell them.

Slowly, her head tilted up and her body slightly relaxed. Boldly, she gave another glance over the she-wolf, and flinched back, her amber gaze jumping away, focusing on anything but what it should be. The wolf's pelt was familiar, with its motley of greys, browns, and whites, far too familiar for her liking. They could have been identical, if it wasn't for the niche in their ear and large scar on their face, to someone she knew in her childhood. She would've asked for their name, if her heart wasn't about to burst in her chest. It was too painful, and she instead tried to detach herself from the scenario that was slowly playing out, mind and gaze going fuzzy as she floated above it all, trying to get a bird's eye view of it all.

“What's your name?” Her voice was hollow and choked, as if it were painful to ask them that question. She quivered slightly, staring directly through them. A low chant started somewhere in the back of her head, a low hum of please,please,please,please. She didn't know what she was begging for, whether it would be for them to say a certain name or for it to all be over. Either way, she didn't dare breathe until she had an answer.

[Deleted]

The little white wolfess was still for a moment, and then shrugged silently. Cerva was beginning to get impatient. She didn't know what her business was?! What! Purple eyes narrowed slightly. Impossible. No wolf trespasses--especially not so far--without knowing their mission. Little suspicions arose in her mind. She was either a very good actress--perhaps a spy come to see how weak Conlan was--or she was so terrified of being hurt and she hid her business. Well, Cerva would not give her any information about Conlan. Just in case. She forced herself to relax slightly, to give a more friendly demeanor. And just in time too.

The she-wolf looked up, and her body slowly relaxed. Amber eyes scanned Cerva for the first time, taking in her multi-colored coat. And then she flinched back, and her eyes dropped once more. What was it that made her flinch every time she looked at her? Cerva grew annoyed. She wanted to snap out words, but she knew it would help.

What's your name?

I am Cervantes. What are you called?

Cervantes' tone was gentle, and she forced herself to relax. She must be patient with the little wolf. She didn't want such a weak thing in Conlan, but she was much too curious now. Something about Cerva seemed to upset and stress the wolf, though she couldn't imagine what it was. Maybe this wolf had had a bad experience and she looked like a wolf in her past? She did not know, but she planned to find out.

muse xx paramore
tags xx @marley
ooc xx so excited (: